Friday, February 12, 2010

What You Should Never Say...

You know how sometimes you're reading a book or watching a movie/show and the hero or heroine says something and you just want to smack them upside the head and say "No!!!! You never say that!"

Well, today I thought we'd discuss things you should never say. No matter how mad you are, whether you think it's funny (because not everyone gets your joke) or even if its deserved.

Here's a few Things You Should Never Say ...

When your significant (or unsignificant, as the case may be) walks in the door and immediately starts ranting about the house being unkempt just because the sheets aren't folded as perfectly as he likes or something like that, and he yells at you, "What do you do all day while I'm at work?!"
Do not, I repeat, do NOT scream back at him, "$%#& the poolboy!"

He won't find it funny. Not even a little bit. It doesn't matter that you don't have a poolboy. You've admitted to infidelity. Doesn't matter it was just a smart response to his jerkish comment. He will totally overlook that and focus on the part where you "admitted infidelity" and your little spat is going to be a huge drag out fight. Trust me. I know ( - ;

When your sweetie asks you "Are we going to do it tonight?" do not, again, do NOT respond with, "With each other?"
Even if it drives you crazy that a grown man asks if you're going to "do it" like you're a couple of teenagers or something. Don't say it. Men just don't find the humor in these things.

And no matter how bad an argument gets, how crazy your man drives you, no matter what he says to rile you up or no matter how tired you are of arguing and he.just.won' and walk away... do NOT growl at him, "You have no idea how hard it is for me not to smother you with your pillow while you're sleeping!" Then again, it will shut him up for a minute or two while he's standing there slack-jawed trying to wrap his mind around what you've just said. Don't ask me how I know... ( - ;

Ok, so those are my pearls of wisdom. Got any to share?

Hey peoples, don't forget to put #CRLwin in your comment to be entered for the drawings later this month. Guardian Cowboy will be the next prize up for grabs.


SaturnMoonie said...

LMAO! Those are hilarious!!!

I'm guessing you had to learn the hard way, huh. Hehe.

I don't have anything to add, I have very limited relationship experience. And I haven't even said any of those!!! :P


Julie Robinson said...

Hilarious! I came over from CTR to see your blog and discovered this very wise posted advice. Thanks for the laugh.

When my DH has come home and nagged (yes, men do it too) about my poor housekeeping skills, I simply told him that if it bothered him, then he should clean it himself. It wasn't going anywhere.

Yep, 21 years in training. I'd hate to change now!

Julie Robinson said...

Oops, I forgot to sign the #CRL win.